HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

Today seems to be one of those "embarrassment of riches" type situations here in North America, what with the simultaneous celebrations of Columbus Day (U.S.) and Thanksgiving (Canada). Of course, we all know by now that Christopher Columbus didn't actually discover America -- or even set foot on what would eventually become the American mainland. He set foot on the Bahamas, for which generations of American vacationers thank him.

I don't really know what the Canadian Thanksgiving is all about. In the U.S., it's when we celebrate the last meal we permitted the Native Americans before we started slaughtering them. Maybe, in Canada, it's when they celebrate universal healthcare or whoever the hell the guy was that discovered hockey. Or curling. Ice-fishing, maybe. Or the loose moosemeat sandwich.

Regardless, this post is rife with irony. The band Columbus is Canadian; the band Canada is American. To be more precise, the band Canada is from Ann Arbor, which is home to the University of Michigan. The University of Michigan's archrival in all things is the Ohio State University, which makes its home in Ohio. Columbus, Ohio. You really can't make this stuff up.

[MP3] Columbus/"Christian Girls"

[MP3] Canada/"Record Function"

BONUS TRACK >>>

[MP3] "Blame Canada" [from South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut]